Youths in My Stories

There are several young people who appear in my stories.  One is, of course, Gena, and later, Erin, in Helen's story.  An important one is Lena, who appears in the Galactic Voyager story, together with Summer.  Alexandra (the story) contains the lovable Ninel.  The Jane stories feature the teen nude model Zsuszana, who is persuaded to take up conventional modeling instead. 

I often think that, in my mind, these characters are blurred together, and it's difficult for me not to think of them as a real person.  In fact, I often think, late at night, that I'll ask one of them, Ninel, or Erin, to solve some problem for me!  When I wake up in the morning, I realize that my 'solution' involves enlisting the aid of an imaginary character, and it leaves me more bereft than you can know.

This compound character is much more completely fleshed-out in my mind than she is in any of the stories; it is my fear—and regret— that my readers will only have a sort of half- formed picture of her.  I don't have any idea how to remedy the situation.  Gena/Erin/Ninel/Lena is a superhero in my mind, much more than Helen, or Alexandra, or Jane, or Aggie, or Maia!

Well, that's my life; once you have created, or given birth, to a character, she never dies. 

Kay

Music that Helen Didn't Play

I was recently listening to some music—on YouTube, of course—in fact, some of my favorite pieces, and got to thinking that I never wrote that Helen, in her conductor days, ever featured some of these!  (I could be wrong; it's been a couple of years since I went into the Helen story, but I remember mostly choral music being conducted by Helen.  There was a set of symphonic variations by Brahms (the St. Anthony Chorale Variations), and the Overture to Die Meistersinger von Nürnberg.  Then of course, there were a number of violin pieces: concertos, mostly, and other pieces featuring solo violin.  The problem was that my musical experience was pretty small, Back in the early 2000s when I wrote Helen at Westfield, which was the story in which she did most of the conducting. 

So the music that I put in the stories would have been too little for those who were interested in music, and too much for those who weren't interested in the music!!!

Kay

Exile's Song

This title would only appeal to a reader who already had a strong idea what the story was about.  It was one of Marion Zimmer Bradley's last few Darkover novels.  And one of her best.

The central character of the two-part story (the second part is titled Shadow Matrix) is a girl called Margaret Alton, one of my all time favorite characters.  She's a girl who was born on the planet Darkover, which is very strange; its sun is blood-red, their culture is medieval, the people are pre-literate, and there's a sizable minority of people who are psychic, who are the nobility of that society.   Lewis, Margaret's father, and his wife Diotima, Margaret's step-mother, are taken off-planet, and Margaret with them.  But both Lewis and the child have psychic ability, and for years the little kid is tortured by the mental turbulence of her father. 

Once she gets into her teens, Margaret escapes to University, which is a whole planet that functions as an academic center, and is finally taken into the home of a music professor.  She settles into a career in music (specifically ethnomusicology,) and never goes home.   She and her advisor travel to various planets, studying the primitive music of backward societies, until, unplanned, they're sent to Darkover, which certainly has what would be considered a typical backward society. 

Well, the personality MZB gives Margaret is interesting.  Margaret gradually discovers that she can read minds, and worse: she can mind-speak—very loudly—to others!  She learns to moderate and control her voice.   She's about 26, BTW.

The point is, the personality I have given Helen, is distressing similar to that of Margaret Alton!  I had read the book when I was a teenager, and evidently was so impressed by the character of Margaret, that I borrowed it for my own story!

The MZB Darkover stories are—necessarily—on the border between SciFi and fantasy, because of the theme of psychic talent.   In the earlier stories, set in the Darkover of thousands of years in the past, people with psychic talents could even fly; MZB gradually moved away from that idea, and towards more moderate abilities for the psychics.  Margaret and her father, and her beloved, are able to 'talk' silently, but not a lot more than that.  Well, actually, the story gets pretty wild in the second part, but to find out exactly in what way, you'll have to read the books yourself!

The Many Moods of Helen

2024 - July - 14

Firstly, a few words about yesterday's attempt to injure—or assassinate—Donald Trump.  We must bear in mind that the whole point of elections, and our complicated procedure for self-government is to simply avoid violence.  This may not be everyone's understanding, it is my understanding, and I'm sure the understanding of the majority of American citizens.  People often wonder how civilized the USA really is.  Well, a measure of that would be: what proportion of the people were unhappy with this attempt to do violence to Trump, and in such a cowardly way?  Ideally it would be everyone; 100%.

Sadly, it's quite possible that people would think: Just this once, I'm OK being considered uncivilized; I wish never to have to think about Trump anymore.  To some degree, Trump has been the reason for many re-assessing how civilized they are, and this is something he should not be proud of. 

Helen Nordstrom

Helen Nordstrom, Ph.D., is the very first character I created, and in many ways the beginning of my fiction writing.  I did not think this through at the time I created her (It's so funny to think that way!  It seems to me that she was always there!) I wanted her to be perfect, a perfect version of myself!  But as the story developed, I needed Helen to be flawed.  In fact, I built in little flaws into her, but most of those were lost when I edited the story to make it more terse and readable, and less prurient!  (The flaws were on the lines of being sexual.)

As I got on with the chapters of the story, and as I grew older and more mature myself, the characteristics of Helen became baked into a real personality—significantly different from me in many ways—and it became easier to write the adventures of Helen. 

What I wanted to explore today is whether—and how much—Helen varied from story to story.  In theory, it's the same woman, and it's a single story.  But in reality, there are slight differences in personality. 

Lisa, Cindy, Violin.

This story was actually titled Helen backstory: Lisa, Cindy, and the violin.  This is the youngest that Helen is in any of the published stories, and really she's just a kid, a sophomore in college, but a very childlike one.  As the story begins, a high-school girl is pursuing Helen romantically, and I had made Helen okay with deciding to have sex with this girl, and sending her on her way, which is not at all typical of Helen as the story moves on. 

Helen and Janet have a sort of relationship.  Helen, flirts a lot with various girls, and Janet is very tired of it.  She decides to go on an extended vacation, and Helen gets involved with a woman who has been kidnapped, whom she meets on the Internet.  The story is really about how Helen manages to free the kidnapped woman who subsequently helps her in many ways. 

Ballet Camp.

This story takes place in France and Belgium.  At this point, Helen has some experience handling young people.  She had helped Janet run a tennis camp; been a leader of a tennis camp in Canada, and without coming out and saying it, we are made aware that Helen recognizes that she has a certain degree of charisma.  This story is a lot about ballet, a lot about music, and about girl-girl romance and intimacy.  Helen is incognito, calling herself Tiffany, and the younger girls adore her. 

Helen and Lalitha.

This is where the story starts to get serious.  So far, Helen has had relationships with older women.  In this story, though,you get the feeling that this is the real thing. 

This is a complex story, and Helen grows as a character throughout the story.  For one thing, Helen spends 10 years in India, and there's very little action during that time.  After she returns to the US, though, with amnesia, all sorts of things happen.  Helen is very unsure of herself while she has amnesia, except that she's very confident about carpentry.  Once her memory returns, she becomes, once again, the hypersexual diva she used to be.  (I don't know why I did that; maybe I was living vicariously, but Helen was wrangling two orphans she had adopted,  Gena and Allie, and she should have shown more restraint.  She has to confront the issue, because Gena is unhappy with her!

My Least Romantic Ŝtory

Maybe that's a dangerous title to use for a blogpost!  Many of my readers here are looking for clues about what books to download, and romance is a major heading for many of them. 

The story I'm talking about is Music on the Galactic Voyager, a story about a space ark, containing a thousand human colonists, that set out in the 21^st Century—just a few years before the present time!—and the problems they faced, and their experiences.  Helen Nordstrom is among them, but in a hibernation state, but the leaders of the project resuscitate her, because they are convinced that she could help them with some serious social problems. 

In the story, it was necessary to describe Helen's character from scratch, since this story doesn't follow along from any of the other Helen stories.

Helen is attracted to several women on the ship, and eventually settles down in a long-term relationship.  But somehow, at least in my mind, her romances were not front and center.  (In fact, there was an ongoing love affair between Helen and a little kid, entirely sexless, that is a lot more central to the story than Helen's romances.)

For reasons having to do with Helen's deteriorating health, she is put in hibernation once more, while they plan how to attack her medical issues.  She is re-thawed 20 years later, by which time Helen's little students, including that little kid whom she loves so much, are mature adults. 

In this story, too, Helen is a musician, and a music teacher.  The reason she is initially 'awoken' is that the shipboard youth are bored, and getting involved with vandalism, and other destructive pastimes.  But the musical references are not at all technical. 

There's a sale on Smashwords, and you can get almost all my stories for free, for the month of July!

Kay

Helen Hits The Oscars

I love to discover that I've written a funny episode!  And I also love it when I discover a (well-written) very serious episode in my  stories—at least in my own estimation, of course.  Unfortunately nobody has ever reviewed a piece of my writing so I don't know what others think of it in the slightest. 

A story that has both a little humor, and a lot of pathos, is Helen and Sharon.  This contains the beginning of the Helen-Sita love affair.  I didn't set out to create an affair between those two; it sort of happened!  I should say: I didn't set out to consciously write a love affair, but I'm firmly convinced that the Harlequin Novelist who hides in my subconscious sort of arranges these things. 

In this story, Helen's relationship with Rain (Evelyn Woodford) is souring, her student, Angie Connors's crush on Helen was confusing her, and she had told the Academy Awards committee that she wouldn't attend (as Sharon Vuehl).  But then, Sita persuaded her to attend, and this story has that story. My plan is to insert an episode of that story right here. 

Why Do I Suck?

For years, I've been reading romantic (teen) fiction, and wondering: why can't I write like these amazing writers whose stuff I'm reading?  Some of these women really hit it out of the park every time, and I have to try so hard to remind myself that I've written good passages, too!  Of course, in terms of mechanics, I feel I'm streets ahead of these gals; grammar, syntax, spelling, vocabulary: I can do all that with both hands tied behind my back.   (Not really really.)

Well, I've had a sad epiphany: there's been hardly any teen drama when I was in school.  My school days were a lot like I described in Yraid: I despised most of my classmates, and had a few unrequited crushes on some others.  It wasn't fun.  It wasn't terrible, either; I just drifted along, imagining being in love with various people—you know how that goes!  (Actually, Helen was invented for that purpose!)  But, like I said, all the juicy stuff got taken out, because, well, it was too embarrassing!  If I had to do it all over again, I'd leave the junk in. 

Kay

Galactic Voyager

I had never noticed before how pompous that title sounded!  Most scifi titles do tend to be a little on the grandiose side.  Not really grandiose; impressive, really.  SciFi aficionados wouldn't notice anything that wasn't on an impressive scale!

I still remember writing this story—again, in chunks—but I specifically remember introducing the character of Lena!  I love kids, and Lena is one of the children whom I adored the most.  (Lena and Summer were created together, and they're both wonderful characters.  If I were a good artist, I'd try to draw Summer; Lena is a little too much of a perfect child, but Summer, I should be able to manage.  She was a thin-ish, shapeless kid, always dressed in a TShirt, and jeans and a jeans jacket, grey eyes, dirty blonde, blonde eyebrows that disappeared into her bangs, a short bob hairstyle.)

Helen started a choir on the ship.  Over the winter break (they created winter on the ship, by reducing the number of hours the heating and lighting was on) they were rehearsing choral numbers in the early morning.  Here's a paragraph describing it:

Summer was in the chorus, though Lena had been deemed a little too young to take the grueling schedule of rehearsals. She didn’t care; she sang along softly as she waited for her friend, all arms and legs and hair. Her hair was long now, a chestnut mane of straight, silky stuff that everyone loved to play with. Little girls often braided it and re-braided it, while Lena blissfully sang.

The words blissfully sang just puts me back into a special place in my mind, where I was when I was writing this chapter; I think I had just realized what a marvelous creation Lena was.  I could not have imagined how her character would develop; Helen and Lena are both major strands in the story.

So is Summer; so is Lena's mother, Daisy, and so are Sheila Connors, and her family!

If any of you had tried to read the story, but been discouraged by the introduction, go find the place where Helen is revived, and start reading there; I give you full permission!

Kay Kay, Kay.

Flowershop Girl

She's once again running away with the statistics (which means 'stats').  I'm going to put on a nominal charge for it. 

Kay

Serious Aspects of the Helen Story Sequence

Of course, the musical parts of the Helen stories are serious; in fact the whole story is serious.  In each story, though—and I didn't set out to have it turn out this way, trust me—Helen slowly matures.  I had noticed that Helen was a big baby, in the earlier stories, and tried to get her to be more responsible, and somehow it turned out that in each story, Helen was painfully learning to join the dots, and to take pleasure in the happiness of the people around her. 

I recently wrote a blog post over on the other blog ('Don't wait for the Movie') on the subject of adulting, and there were lots of references to the Helen stories, so I thought I may as well sort of cross-post that post over here.

Its title is Adulting.

K H B

Just Keeping in Touch

Actually, a lot happened today, most importantly, I watched the Barbie movie!  I have to let that sink in some, so I'll give you my take on it tomorrow. 

I was at my friend's just at meal time again, so I got to feed the pets!  The dogs were cute, as always, but the kitten was just so perfect!!!  There's nothing fancy, you know; you serve the food out, and the dogs just inhale it.  But the cat just slowly and deliberately eats it, but it's super cute!  Oh man; whoever invented cats needs to get some sort of reward!

Well, that's the other thing; the only pets that I noticed in 'Barbieland' were horses!  How stupid is that?  I suppose Mattel never made Barbie kittens, then?

See you tomorrow!

K

Sheila

Just read Flowershop Girl.  Somehow, I had deleted my own copy, so I had to (1) set the price to 0, (2) go back on the Smashwords website, (3) actually buy the story—which should have been free to me, as the author— (4) download it, and read it.  There's one more step: (5) set the price to what it was.  I'll do it tomorrow!

Sheila, the Flowershop Girl, is just such a 💓!  (What's that emoji?  I should read all the available emoji research ...)  In addition to Sheila and Helen, the story also colors in Lorna's personality a lot!

Kay.